I Heart You
I read a line posted in an online forum today from a fellow who is a very close friend of mine. The line went as follows:
"Traditionally, Valentine's Day is for lovers and romance. Valentine's Night is for apologies and trips to the emergency room."
I started thinking about that, and I had the good fortune of chatting at length with some female co-workers, and I came to the conclusion that Valentine's Day may be for lovers, but even if we don't screw it up, it is still without a doubt the single least romantic day of the year.
One co-worker told me her husband wanted to get her some chocolate roses to celebrate their love. Unfortunately, she recently began a new diet, so her husband had to ask her if chocolate roses were something she could even eat, thereby ruining any surprise the gift might bring.
Now if you think about it, surprise is kind of a stupid element to consider anyway, because every woman alive knows it's Valentine's Day. They know (or at least expect) they are going to get something. But the surprise in this case was ruined because the husband had to ask, and the value of the gift was reduced to nothing because her diet does not allow her chocolate.
As a last resort, the husband offered to clean the bathrooms as a gift to his lovely bride; a good gift to any married woman, no doubt, but hardly romantic.
"I took my girl for a helicopter ride over the skyline for Valentine's Day, and then a quiet dinner overlooking the lake. What did you do?"
"I picked hair out of the drains and scrubbed the toilets."
It's clear that anything forced, or anything expected is going to lack punch when it comes to being romantic. And having a day of the year set aside for that specific purpose is forcing it.
Sure, many men like having Valentine's Day on the calendar, because let's face it, most of us would not otherwise entertain any notions of romance if ad agencies, florists, and candy companies didn't remind us that it's good to do something nice for our ladies every once in a while. Were it not stamped into our psyches by virtue of it's place in mid-February, our idea of romance would consist of a grunting roll in the hay after we filled our bellies with mead and charred animal flesh. That's just the way we're wired.
But aren't the ladies being sold short having a contrived celebration like this? Isn't an obligation to be romantic much less satisfying than a desire to be romantic?
I don't know. Maybe women understand us enough to know that Valentine's Day just might be the best they are ever going to get. Maybe they are resigned to be happy with whatever meager bit of romance we can offer, even if it is forced. If that's the case, guys we have to love our ladies more so because of that.
Still, we can surprise them every once in a while, can't we? It's not too difficult to show a little creativity, is it? Do something for your girl on a random day without being prodded by anyone else. Do something sweet for her from the heart.
At the very least, we may be able to avoid the apologies and trips to the emergency room on Valentine's Night.
"Traditionally, Valentine's Day is for lovers and romance. Valentine's Night is for apologies and trips to the emergency room."
I started thinking about that, and I had the good fortune of chatting at length with some female co-workers, and I came to the conclusion that Valentine's Day may be for lovers, but even if we don't screw it up, it is still without a doubt the single least romantic day of the year.
One co-worker told me her husband wanted to get her some chocolate roses to celebrate their love. Unfortunately, she recently began a new diet, so her husband had to ask her if chocolate roses were something she could even eat, thereby ruining any surprise the gift might bring.
Now if you think about it, surprise is kind of a stupid element to consider anyway, because every woman alive knows it's Valentine's Day. They know (or at least expect) they are going to get something. But the surprise in this case was ruined because the husband had to ask, and the value of the gift was reduced to nothing because her diet does not allow her chocolate.
As a last resort, the husband offered to clean the bathrooms as a gift to his lovely bride; a good gift to any married woman, no doubt, but hardly romantic.
"I took my girl for a helicopter ride over the skyline for Valentine's Day, and then a quiet dinner overlooking the lake. What did you do?"
"I picked hair out of the drains and scrubbed the toilets."
It's clear that anything forced, or anything expected is going to lack punch when it comes to being romantic. And having a day of the year set aside for that specific purpose is forcing it.
Sure, many men like having Valentine's Day on the calendar, because let's face it, most of us would not otherwise entertain any notions of romance if ad agencies, florists, and candy companies didn't remind us that it's good to do something nice for our ladies every once in a while. Were it not stamped into our psyches by virtue of it's place in mid-February, our idea of romance would consist of a grunting roll in the hay after we filled our bellies with mead and charred animal flesh. That's just the way we're wired.
But aren't the ladies being sold short having a contrived celebration like this? Isn't an obligation to be romantic much less satisfying than a desire to be romantic?
I don't know. Maybe women understand us enough to know that Valentine's Day just might be the best they are ever going to get. Maybe they are resigned to be happy with whatever meager bit of romance we can offer, even if it is forced. If that's the case, guys we have to love our ladies more so because of that.
Still, we can surprise them every once in a while, can't we? It's not too difficult to show a little creativity, is it? Do something for your girl on a random day without being prodded by anyone else. Do something sweet for her from the heart.
At the very least, we may be able to avoid the apologies and trips to the emergency room on Valentine's Night.
posted by Sam Ogden at
3:46 PM
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